God. A white man with a long white beard who lives on a cloud? Some presence to be feared a that is always checking up on you?
Growing up I was drawn to Church, to the idea of something bigger than me that I could rely on to guide me in my life. Each time I sought to find this in religion I was sorely disappointed. Once having an out of body experience I was told that the Church doesn’t believe in things like that and dismissed me without any explanation. Each time I felt I was moving towards something much greater than me I was met with some disapproval for my ideas or my disclosure as to how I felt. So slowly the Church and my idea of God became tainted and something to not share with others. It seemed God was only accessible to a few.
Then I found Yoga. Yoga is not a religion. Yoga is a spiritual practice. It originated in the East and as such has many Hindu, Sikh and Buddhist practices. And that is what makes yoga so beautiful. It doesn’t tell you what to think, it doesn’t tell you which God is right and real or which religion is the best. It accepts all with an open and loving heart.
Recently I have been drawn to Kundalini Yoga which was brought to the West by Yogi Bhajan, an amazing Yogi and Sikh. This morning I was listening to the Jaap Sahib as instructed by my Kundalini teacher Paramata Siri Sadhana. As I listened to the chanting I started to reflect on my Summer. I have welcomed 50 people to live with me and my family and practice yoga together. Most people appreciate and enjoy the experience. But once in a while I meet someone who doesn’t, and who writes a scathing review once away from my home which really hurts my open heart.
I realised that even though I felt hurt by these few I had seen God in each of them. Each one of them had shown me their light even if it was just for a split second - when we connected over a mutual teacher, in the water after catching a wave, when I offered a hug upon leaving. The light of God shined in their eyes. My mind began to question this, what do you mean, you think you can see God in everyone, not possible, what about that man who was shouting at you when you were holding your newborn baby in your arms? And I remembered the incident and the fact that yes the man did shout at me but then for a moment he reached out and touched my daughter’s arm. I saw God in him. It was true.
The true realisation of what God is hit me in all it’s gloriousness.
The light, the love that you can find in every single person’s eyes. I have never felt such a profound sense of connection to everyone, at this moment I knew we are all one. There is no God outside of us, God is within each and every one of us. Some people find it so hard to allow their God to be seen because of fear but if you look carefully you will see God shining within them.
And so now I’m living for the God in every single moment.